The Apple
by BRIGHT-and-SHINY-girl
Summary: Lorelai's thoughts after eating an apple while Sookie is in labour. What does this mean for her and Rory? DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. ONESHOT, possible to expand if you want. First FanFic


Lorelai surveyed the contents of the vending machine and, absentmindedly, selected D5. Grabbing her selection from the chute, she was surprised to see that she in fact held an apple in her hand. Not that it would be strange for most people, but for her it was most peculiar. It looked good though and, after all, Emily Gilmore had been rabbiting on about the recommended amount of fruit and vegetable servings per day.

"Is that Andy Dick in the hallway?"

Lorelai remembers Sookie and, rather sheepishly that her friend was in the midst of labour, slightly pausing before rushing to be at her friend's side.

As Sookie and Jackson disputed over baby names and God knows what else, Lorelai reflected on the night before, pulling out her apple after Jackson _finally_ left.

"Really? You're gonna eat that?" Sookie asked, stopping Lorelai from taking her bite.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I can put it away if you-"

"No, no, that's fine, I just know that it's not your thing."

"Yeah, but it just looked so good-"

"-like Ben Stiller!"

"Um… yeah? Anyway, I'm just gonna go ring Rory. I think the whole "coming round the mountain" imagery gave her a fright!"

After a rather embarrassing phone call with Rory, Lorelai imagined cradling another baby – her baby – in her arms. As Rory had said, it was Luke. How bad would it be?

"_Luke, Luke! Guess what!" Rory called out to Luke as she ran into the diner._

"_Wooh there Rory! I know you're excited but slow down there!" Luke responded anxiously, hoping that her eagerness wouldn't result in another broken arm, "Anyway, Happy Birthday sweetie! I got you –"_

" – _Mum said that I can have pancakes __and_ _waffles today!"_

_Luke heard the door opening again, seeing Lorelai wander in._

"_So Luke, what'd you get me", cooed Rory as she sidled up to the diner owner._

"_Rory! That's rude!" scolded Lorelai, silently apologising to Luke_

Luke had always been there for both Rory and her. He had even put up with Emily and Richard from time to time, something many of her boyfriends never managed to do!

But he was Luke. She knew that she had feelings there for him somewhere, and there was no doubt that he had feelings for her. But it was Luke! Apart from Rory, he was her best friend. She couldn't have child with him, could she?

It wasn't as if she didn't want another child. She did. Just not now. She didn't want to be alone again. Her life was great, not that it wouldn't be with a baby, but she couldn't be a single mother all over again. She didn't have the strength to do it, especially with Rory away at Yale. With Rory being away, Lorelai knew that she'd be alone with the baby, not that there was a problem with that, but the lack of human interaction would drive her crazy.

She had always known that she had done it all wrong. She had a baby at sixteen, not exactly something to be proud of. From there she worked hard and bought a house, or at least got a loan to buy a house, always keeping her relationships under the radar, hidden from her daughter. Rory was the centre of her universe and there was no way that she wanted that to change. But it would if… if she were… but she was determined not to think about that. The thing was, she would never have wanted it any other way.

Logically, it did not make sense to get so worked up about the possibility of having another kid just because she ate an apple, but, to Lorelai, that alone was evidence. If she didn't react so much it would be proof that nothing was amiss, but the fact that she cared so much led her to believe that something was up because she was not being logical. Which, when she thought about it, just confused her even more.

By this stage of her life, Lorelai had expected to be married with dozens of kids climbing around the house. Well, that was the plan originally before Rory came along. But she had still expected that she would be married, or at least settled down. Rory was the best thing that had ever happened to her and without her Lorelai would be such a different person. Looking back on her teenage years with Christopher, she knew that getting pregnant really made her a better person, although her parents would disagree.

She had been forced to grow up overnight, which had ultimately been the making of Lorelai Gilmore. Once she made the decision to leave Gilmore Manor, her affectionate name for the mansion she had grown up in, she had to change. She worked hard to give Rory everything that she could, lucky to be given a job as a maid at the Independence Inn. She was determined to impress Mia, the mother she didn't have whilst her own parents treated her like a failure, she had disappointed them and poisoned the Gilmore family name. She became responsible, working a full-time job as a single mother of a newborn, difficult for anyone but at sixteen it was almost impossible. She had succeeded.

Rory was more than Lorelai ever imagined of her daughter. She was smart, funny and beautiful, much more like herself than she would want to admit. Lorelai knew that if her daughter had to live with Emily and Richard she would be just like her. They were almost the same person, being mistaken as sisters on a regular basis. They both hated exercise and healthy eating, sharing a fast metabolism. It often surprised Lorelai that Rory was the daughter of Christopher Hayden, struggling to see the resemblance. To her, Rory was her daughter and it was almost as if Christopher had never existed. For 18 years they had spent so much time together that it was so difficult letting her go for college.

It wasn't as if Rory didn't already have a sibling, she had GiGi, Christopher's "perfect" daughter, after the birth of which he seemed to forget the existence of his first born. It wasn't the same though. Lorelai had been there, prepared to hold Sherry's hand, the woman who married the father of her child, her fantasy ma, whilst in labour. It wasn't fair, yet he had the audacity to treat Lorelai as if she was just another friend. They had plans; travelling Europe, getting married, becoming famous, and then there was Rory. He had never been there for his daughter.

But what would it be like having another child in the home. Lorelai remembered the times when Rory came home from school, often near Christmas time, wishing for a baby brother or sister. She had always laughed, sometimes wishing it was that easy. As Rory grew, she stopped asking, but Lorelai never knew if it was because she simply didn't want a sibling or if she just knew that it wouldn't happen. It wasn't something that ever was worked into daily conversation, so Lorelai was perennially in the dark as to Rory's true wishes. Perhaps she had simply given up.

Then there was Luke to think about. Not only did he appear to hate kids but he wasn't into the whole steady relationship thing. It had taken 9 years of daily coffee and meals to get a date, and maybe one night of primordial behaviour had changed it all. She knew that he was good with teenagers, after Liz dumped Jess in his care, but as for babies, she wasn't even sure if he had ever held a newborn. They were finally in a good place after what had seemed like years of fighting the inevitable. Finally. A baby would change everything, and she wasn't sure that she wanted that to happen.

Lorelai had always believed that she had been sent Rory for a reason. She was her best friend and the reason for leaving her mother's house and beginning work at the Independence Inn. Maybe, if it were true there would be a reason. What would this child bring her? At the very least she would have to slow down a little, there would be no way that she could continue her high paced life with a baby. She loved her life, but she loved being a mother more. Her life was about to change again, but it wouldn't be bad. Last time she had gotten out of school and, look how that turned out. She was ready again. No matter what happened, she knew that her life would change regardless, but with Rory away at college it was almost like she would have to start all over again.

No, she wouldn't be alone. She'd have Luke.

"_She's Perfect" she said as Christopher stood next to her._


End file.
